Comments on: Playing without rooks

By: Terry Odell

Terry Odell — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 13:17:47 +0000

I think you’ve described “Show don’t tell.” One should never say, “He was angry.” Show the character putting his fist through the wall, or clenching his jaw, or whatever coping mechanism you have given him. To me, that’s internalization.

And movies aren’t ever really ‘telling’ unless there’s an outside narrator. That’s why so often I’ll go read the book if I’ve seen a movie — so I can see how the author handled a scene where we’re left to interpret a character’s feelings by his actions. Some actors are better than others at conveying those inner thoughts!

By: Sam

Sam — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 01:08:00 +0000

Terry – Think of THE MALTESE FALCON. We never get inside Sam Spade’s head; we have only his actions, the things he says, and the details of the things he notices to indicate what’s going on in there. For example, after the detective punches Spade and then leaves, Spade curses him loudly and then explains that he hates to let someone slug him and get away with it. But Hammet doesn’t tell us “Spade felt cheated of the chance to get even with the detective,” or anything like that. That’s what I’m going for.

By “perceptions of the setting,” I mean that the choice of setting details to reveal, and how they are described, are determined by the character’s state of mind. I suppose it would have been more accurate to say, “what the character perceives of the setting.”

When this draft is done, I’ll be happy to share.

By: Terry Odell

Terry Odell — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 12:20:26 +0000

I would LOVE to see how you’ve managed that, because I’m always nagging my crit partner that he doesn’t have nearly enough internalization and everything seems flat to me.

Or course, “Perceptions of the setting” are also ‘internalizations’ I would think.

What would it take to see a bit of your story?

By: Kaye George

Kaye George — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 02:30:16 +0000

What a good idea, Sam! Let us know how this turns out. It sounds like it might work.